Silence is your friend

In a recent coaching session, a client reflected that her team goes quiet every time she asks a direct question in meetings.

Not resistant.
Not sullen.
Just quiet.

We dug into it together.

And it turned out she almost always answered her own question after about four seconds of silence.

Four seconds.

She even timed herself in a meeting to check if that was true.

Her team had learned they didn't need to answer.
Because she would always jump in.

So we practiced something simple.

She asks the question.
Then she counts to ten in her head before she says another word.

It felt excruciating to her the first time.
(And the second and the third.)

But guess what?
Her team started talking.

Silence isn't space to fill.
It's the space that lets others think.