The younger version of you wants this

A phrase I heard a lot growing up?

“Stop being so bossy.”

Every time someone said it, I shrank a little smaller.

It wasn’t just about my tone.

It was about being shamed for having an opinion.
For speaking up.
For taking up space.

As a girls’ school graduate (Go Westover School!) and a mother of a daughter, it’s a phrase I’d love to see retired.

Because here’s the truth:

I did have opinions.
(Let’s be honest. I still do.)

And that’s a good thing.

What people missed back then was that I was actually quite shy.
So when I did speak up, it meant the moment really mattered to me.

Today, I see so many girls and women holding the same tension between being thoughtful and being heard.

We’re told to be confident.
But not too confident.

To lead.
But not too boldly.

To speak up.
But not too often.

I believe the work of leadership, especially for women, is learning to hold that dichotomy.

To be both thoughtful and outspoken.
Kind and firm.
Quiet and powerful.

Because the truth is, we can (and should) be all of it.
The younger version of you wants this.